Ups and Downs

I did some research 😊 (meaning I talked to some fellow 3Plers... 😃) I thought I'd share what I found because I think it might be helpful for some of you too.
Since being in this conversation (first learned about the 3P at the beginning of this year) I've been feeling much much better. Not just on a physical level (chronic pain was what brought me here), but in so many other areas. I'm seeing so much new stuff and a lot of stressful issues have changed or fallen away. And some 'difficult' circumstances just aren't much of a problem anymore. However, during the last 2 or 3 months I experienced a curious phenomenon: It seems that I sometimes get random pain flare-ups out of nowhere. Or sometimes even following a few days full of joy and new insights and feeling very free and content. Since I'm still a bit conditioned from the classic TMS approach, every time this happens I immediately come up with some ideas of what I might 'have done wrong'. Like being 'too excited' or maybe having overlooked something that's been troubling me. At the same time I could watch myself with every time this was happening getting less and less likely to get caught up in this kind of thinking. Maybe because of my grounding in the 3P is deepening or something like that. With my last flare-up a few days ago on the first day it truly felt like I was watching these thoughts come and go, they didn't effect my emotional state.
On the second day it changed, I got annoyed and more 'why??' thinking came up. I watched some webinar and read some posts and suddenly I realized, that I'm still holding on to some belief, that experiencing pain is not okay. That it means I have done something wrong.