I just saw something interesting about my thinking. There are all kinds of thoughts going through my head all the time, but depending on the circumstances or situation I'm in I give it more or less credibility. And that makes all the difference. I noticed this before, in comparison to a friend - I could see, that some thoughts that she finds scary don't bother me, they just don't look true to me and so they pass by very quickly. But now I'm seeing that it also happens in a different way. And I think it is a big factor with things like anxiety/depression/chronic pain and so on. Like when I have a low day and don't feel like doing anything, it doesn't bother me much. I have nothing on it. No story attached to it. I don't believe that it says something about me, it doesn't mean 'I'm depressed'. It also doesn't make me believe, that my life is in any way depressing. But I guess this might look very different to someone who has a history of being diagnosed with depression. But of course for me when the thought comes up 'oh, my back feels kind of funny' and when maybe earlier that day I did something that might fall under my definition of 'over-exhausting' myself, that thought gets given a whole lot of credibility. It seems true, it seems to have a meaning. It's a thought I take seriously. And so it scares me and I tend to dwell on it. I don't know - maybe this isn't news to you guys 😃 I feel like I just saw a new layer of it...
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